Or, 100 Reasons Why I Rock, or Things to Remember In Case I Get Amnesia and Happen to Find This.
Anyway, I saw a trend in which blog authors were posting various tidbits about themselves, and I figured, what the heck, it’s not like I have anything better to write about at the moment anyway.
So, in the first installment of four, I give you “Identity Crisis: 100 Things About Me That You Could Care Less About But I’m Saying Anyway”.
1. I’m a semester ahead in college, but don’t plan on graduating early because I enjoy sponging off my folks too much.
2. I currently work three separate jobs, all of which I love doing.
3. At one of the aforementioned jobs, I’m currently writing this and ignoring the phone ringing right next to me because I’m about to go off duty.
4. I have a vaguely unhealthy obsession with correct grammar, despite the fact that I used “ain’t” in a sentence today and regularly say “y’all” to people.
5. Sometimes, usually when I’m watching TV, I try to stretch out my hand and use the Force to grab the remote.
6. Then, I realize that I’m a hopeless nerd.
7. To compound my situation of #6, I also realize that I’m doing this while watching a Gilmore Girls rerun on ABC Family for the second time.
8. I love to cook, and take special joy in being able to make French Press coffee well (much to the delight of anyone who visits our apartment).
9. When I used to live in western Maryland, my dentist was one of my best friends.
10. If there’s one thing that drives me bonkers, it’s bad grammar.
11. As a corollary to #10, I particularly enjoying editing other people’s writing and eviscerating their poor word choices and spelling. Some people have comfort foods, I have grammar.
12. Perhaps this is why Paradigm Reborn hired me. That, or perhaps they thought I needed a job.
13. I’m extremely proud of my Italian heritage, and can trace my lineage back a hundred years or so to the Mother Land thanks to an ancestry that a relative oh-so-conveniently made for everyone two years ago.
14. And no, I’m not a part of La Cosa Nostra. Not that I know of, at any rate.
15. Apparently, I look like Orlando Bloom, at least, according to all the underclassman girls who tell me this on campus (I’ve counted seven so far). Just change the face, height, and body type, and I swear, we could’ve been clones.
16. I drive a Red 1993 Olds Cutlass Supreme, nicknamed “All-Star” or “Rory”, depending on if I’ve seen Gilmore Girls on the day in question.
17. I bought the aforementioned car from a volleyball player, which is why the words “All Star” are printed on it. No, I’m not a big enough tool to glorify myself on a blog AND a car.
18. Statistically, men are supposed to prefer cubist paintings to impressionistic, according to a discussion in art class. I’ll take Van Gogh any day over something all harsh and edged, though I do have a special place in my heart for Wassily Kandinsky.
19. It is my goal in life to eventually play Iago in a stage production of Othello, and that worries me.
20. I was never good at sports. I liked four square.
21. I love languages, especially French, and I speak it fairly okay, though I think I may have a bit of a quebecois accent.
22. My roommate and I just had a frank discussion on favorite term for “woman of questionable morals.” I prefer “trollop”, while he likes “harlot”.
23. I write way too much, especially when I should be doing something else.
24. I suck at writing poetry, yet I know there’s a good poem in me somewhere.
25. I used to live next to Canada in one of the northernmost towns in the contiguous 48 states.
And on a side note, my facebook picture makes me look like a supervillain. I’m so pleased.
Tune in next time for part 2, if I feel like writing it.
Hey, Ben,
That was very interesting….
In a restaurant, do you sit with your back to the door? or just the opposite? (In other words, facing the door).
You don’t look like Orlando Bloom, so when people say that as they see you, I try my best to dissuade them, as they are wrong.
Is there a term for men with questionable morals? There should be.
1. He looks exactly like Orlando Bloom.
Hey, this self-centered list-making thing is easy!
2. His accent is distinctly Acadian, as he first learned French in Maine. Hey, it sticks with you forever.
3. He has the rockingest sister in the world.
4. She has more than mastered the Remote Control Force, because when SHE reaches her hand out, someone else gets up and puts the remote in her hand and then brings her a soda. Now that is power! The only question: does it come from the Dark Side?
5. That’s her French Press he uses. Her spare one.
Dude. Benny-boo looks soooo like Orlando Bloom.
1. I used “testing the Force while being to lazy to get the remote control” in an early 10-4GB post. Boo.
2. No one should ever call anyone “Benny Boo.”
3. “Trollop” and “harlot” are both excellent, but “strumpet,” “floozy,” and “scarlet woman” are really better choices.
4. He’s too edgy to pass for Bloom. Maybe young Sean Penn.
5. He and his apartment mates are the studliest studs on campus.
Did you ever notice that one never sees Ben and Orlando Bloom at the same time, in the same place?
I’m his cousin wyman. I’ll call him whatever I want.